Breaking News: Michelle Bachman to show nipple on Bloomberg debate

Taking a page from the Nancy Grace “wardrobe failure” on Dancing with the Stars, sources close to GOP Presidential candidate Michelle Bachman says she is determined to have a strategic nipple slip. Bachman hopes that showing “a little somethin’, somethin'” will rejuvinate her waning presidential bid. Bachman is almost dead last in the polls.

The source revealed that Bachman has been working out the plan all day during debate prep. As the questions and answers are all rehearsed before hand, it is hinted that Bachman will reveal her stuff during  a question regarding the viability of the International Monetary Fund and Third World debt relief, which she knows nothing about.

Two staffers have already stormed out of Bachman’s campaign quarters, one of them complaining, “If I see another nipple I’m giving up sex forever!” Adding, “I’ll have nightmares from this, for sure. Maybe I’ll need therapy.”

Clearly upset by this Newt Gingrich complained in passing, “I swear, if even a dust bunny falls out of that blouse it will definitely be a full moon on stage tonight; hairy dippled and full!”

About 900poundgorilla

W.C. Turck is a Chicago playwright and the author of four widely acclaimed books.His latest is "The Last Man," a prophetic novel of a world ruled by a single corporation. His first novel, "Broken: One Soldier's Unexpected Journey Home," was reccommended by the National Association of Mental Health Institutes. His 2009 Memoir, "Everything for Love" chronicled the genocide in Bosnia and the siege of Sarajevo. His third book "Burn Down the Sky" is published exclusively on Amazon Kindle. It was in Sarajevo at the height of the siege where he met and married his wife, writer and Artist Ana Turck. FOX NEWS, ABC, CBS News, the Chicago Tribune and The Joliet Herald covered their reunion after the war. He helped organized relief into Rwanda during the 1994 genocide. Turck has been a guest on WMAQ-TV, WLS in Chicago, WCPT, WBBM radio, National Public Radio, Best Of the Left and the Thom Hartmann show. He has spoken frequently on Human Rights, Genocide and Nationalism. In 2011, his play in support of the Occupy Movement, "Occupy My Heart-a revolutionary Christmas Carol" recieved national media attention and filled theaters to capacity across Chicago. He remains an activist to the cause of human rights and international peace. View all posts by 900poundgorilla

4 responses to “Breaking News: Michelle Bachman to show nipple on Bloomberg debate

  • xPraetorius

    Real classy, 900! Is THIS supposed to make me think you’re arguments are the ones I should hold? Really? This isn’t even silly…it’s worse than that. Heck, it’s not even HIGH SCHOOL!

    I challenge you to swear off this kind of drivel and never to sink this low again.

    Furthermore, I challenge you to denounce all others on your side who engage in this kind of stupid, inane, infantile hooey.

    I know, I know…you’ll say, “But, No! They do it too!” as if that’s some great principled stand…

    Same argument my young kids have tried numerous times on me. And, like your parents must have, I simply respond, “If Mikey does something wrong, and stupid — anything at all…does that make it right for YOU to do the same wrong and stupid thing?”

    Of course, they know the correct answer. And, you know what? They don’t try it any more, ’cause they know how silly it sounds.



    • 900poundgorilla

      I missed you, old friend. Hope that you’ve been well. As for the article, and swearing off sarcasm, can’t do it, mate. And it is funny. It is. Maybe not from where your standing, but in another life on another blog I went at Hillary Clinton just as hard and biting over her fake tears, and later over her little fiction about about being shot at in Sarajevo. Trust me, if I had 10 minutes to kill, a couple of beers, had a crappy day at work and the Left threw up another bombastic goof, I’d be slinging sarcasm their way too.

      Do I hide behind the “they did it too” defense? No way. I did it. I stand by it. I don’t make excuses. They are all fairgame for ridicule, disdain and parody when they begin to lose sight that they are servants and not dukes and duchesses…left, right and center.

      Stick around, something tells me with the quality of candidates as we close in on the election, from both parties, I think I can get even lower.

      Be well my friend, and thanks for taking the time. I much prefer a fiery adversary than a dull friend.

  • Trying a New Thing with the Left. Trying to Challenge Them to be Better. (WARNING: LONG posts below…I reproduced in full my discussion with a blogger on the left who seems like a nice enough guy, but just can’t seem to refrain from speaking in

    […] Nota Bene: So, following up on my commitment to check out 900pound’s other stuff, I found myself here:… […]

  • xPraetorius

    Sooooo…are you going to respond to my challenge, above?



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